Child Centered Parenting versus Parent Centered Parenting

Proud Mommy Moment Naomi Mc Laughlan 14 June 2017

To be or not to be….or the chicken and the egg question comes to mind, doesn’t it?

Since my son Jason has turned 20 yesterday, I have reflected upon the past 20 years of parenthood and the experiences I have accumulated over the years…

His first smile, first word, first step, first birthday, first day at kindergarten, first day at school etc. So many pressures memories, almost unbelievable how fast the time has passed!

I also noticed how many other parents I have encountered; during pre-birth classes, at nursery, kindergarten, school and hobby groups, as well as my son’s friendship cycle. Many different approaches to parenting, many little lives influenced on how their parents conducted the ‘parenting game of life’.

I have learned that some focus their approach around the child, value the little person as a unique individual who cannot conform to ‘norms’, but rather allow them to flourish and explore the world, while the parent (s) organise their lives based on their child’s needs and wants.

Meanwhile, I have also met many parents who ‘add their child on’ to their life, life style and general way of approaching their day-to-day. By for example, continuing their life’s pretty much as prior to having had the child; they continue their work schedule and leisure time and manage their child’s day by delegating childcare either between each other and also towards family members or childcare providers, friends and other children entertaining activities. They continue to meet up with friends and when they go out as a family they base their choice on what they (the parent(s)) would like to do, not their child. Interestingly, those parents often wonder why their child ‘misbehaves’ e.g. can’t sit still in an adult centred restaurant and even doesn’t like the food served or during a show that they are not interested in.

In my opinion, there is no ‘right or wrong’ type of parenting, as each child is so different, even within the same family. My three children are entirely different and truly need and want very different approaches, not just based on their age, but also based on their individual interests and personal preferences.

However, I do think that parents need to pause and reflect on a regular basis, to spot issues asap, to avoid taking a route that is damaging for the child or even for themselves.

I have met mums who constantly hover over their kids, completely lose their sense of self and practically live solely to please their children. Or mums and dads who feel burdened when they ‘should or have to’ spend extended times with their kids, buy as many toys as they can and yet still find little to no connection, while those children have no interest in their countless toys and are constantly bored. Both are unhealthy in my opinion, as both will lead to heart ache in the long run, for all involved.

In my parenting, I have always tried to balance between the two and learned that this approach is best, not just for my eldest, but also for my younger two girls. For example, when we want to eat somewhere together, we choose a buffet (most often Chinese) or simply McD’s (although their veggie menu is limited), as the first offers the option to choose food everyone likes and the second that the children (almost) cannot ‘misbehave’ (be a child, move around and not noise restricted), as it clearly is a child centred food outlet (balloons, crayons and paper and toys included). Another example is that while I drive and drop my kids to their hobby sessions (ballet, judo etc.), I either take a book with me and read while they enjoy their sessions, chat with another mum while drinking a nice cup of coffee or listen to an audiobook. I use these pockets of time to also enjoy the time, so that I don’t feel that I am ‘just the Taxi’.

I do have to admit though, that if I had to honestly evaluate which side I am on, I would consider my parenting approach to be child centered, and I guess that has come from learning experiences of the past 20 years; If you try to enjoy an adult type activity, don’t force a child to enjoy it and vice versa. Although, I do actually enjoy many child centered activities, e.g Disney and Co.

I had my son very early in my life, so I guess that is another reason why I enjoy the child centered approach, as I was so young I had not yet established a ‘me first’ e.g. ‘selfish way of life style’ that may have led me to feel ‘disturbed’ by my child’s needs and wants. Instead, as I wanted to traveled the world, for example, I chose places and hotels etc. which would entertain both of us. In addition, as I had my second child 5 years later and then my third another 6 years later, the child centered approach made even more sense, the bigger the family became. Which led to many decisions, including to homeschool, to start my business six years ago, working from home serving customers around the world and writing business and children books.

I would love to read your thoughts on this! Have you found a parenting approach that works well? If so, please share it in the comment section below. Thanks 😉

All the Best,

Naomi xxx

P.S.: Enjoy every second of being a parent!

Want to join My MLM / Network Marketing Business??? Yikes (Warning Rant included!)

Your Opportunity Naomi Mc Laughlan

I was inspired to consider this topic by an invitation I received to join a Multi-Level Marketing (MLM) aka Network Marketing firm, by a new friend. (My long-term friends already KNOW not to ask…)
My initial reaction, after watching a video presentation, was NOOOOOO thank you!!! Been there, done that! Not for me!!! LESSON LEARNED…sharing it here just for you!

Yes, I speak of FIRST HAND experience, as I have been part of several MLM company’s myself, incl. Tupperware, Amway, Jamie at Home, Avon and the likes….

Every time I thought ‘ooooh maybe it is the product’, NOOOOOPE IT IS THE BUSINESS MODEL!!!

I KNOW that 99% of MLM sign-ups do not make even enough money to claim that they ‘pay themselves’ / earn a minimum wage from profits and bonuses received.

The upside of MLM’s:
• You can claim that that the product has helped X number of people, based on the entire business / brand NOT JUST YOU, who might have signed up an hour ago.

• You can put your name in one sentence with celebrities / famous peeps who have endorsed the business / brand / product.

• You can claim that the products you sell are sold in X number of countries, even though YOU MIGHT SELL TO YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS ONLY.

• You get a discount on all the products you may want to buy (Hint: This is one of the biggest income stream these companies actually make money with!!! New sign-ups who spend their hard-earned cash, which they earned elsewhere)

• Potentially you can earn from any $/£ of your own downline, given that you consistently motivate people to sign up and DO THE WORK…

• You get (most often) free training and access to nice events at (most often) awesome venues – This to be honest is the ONLY reason why I would join if I were you!

The downside of MLM’s:
• You have no business, unless you constantly sell; first to your inner network e.g. family and friends, then to work colleagues, neighbours etc. and lastly to anyone who you come across.

• You are depended on building your own network of ‘Busy Bees’ aka new sign-ups, otherwise you run out of names on your contact list.

• You must ASK ANYBODY, to ‘Join the Club’ and Buy, with the motto “After X number of NO’s THERE MUST BE a yes…”
• You cannot ‘Brand’ YOUR BUSINESS, as anyone in your network sells the same products.

• You cannot make a living! Yes, I said it!!! How many hours have you worked in the last three months, or since you have started and how much money did you make? And please don’t tell me that you are still growing…show me YOUR numbers, not how much you CAN POTENTIALLY make or how much the ‘company’ makes each year etc.

On the other site, IF YOU START YOUR OWN BUSINESS, either solely online based or a location aka ‘brick and mortar’ business, YOU CAN BRAND YOU AND THE WAY YOU DO BUSINESS, for example price, location, service quality, product range, BECAUSE from having started, operated and sold two out of three businesses in the past 16+ years, in both the B2B and B2C sector across several industries, I know that this is the key to differentiation and ultimately it works…And YES, you can work around your kids schedule doing so.

I would love to hear your take on this!
Naomi xxx

P.S.: Need help starting, building or growing your business? Great! Head over to my website to book your 1st Strategy Session with me! https://www.naomimclaughlan.com/more/business-coaching/

P.P.S: If you feel offended because you have started your MLM business, sorry to hear that! You might be the 1% who can pull it off. And if so, I am happy to write about your outstanding business! Yes, I really mean that, for the bottom of my heart

 

Ultimate Success Smackdown!

Ultimate Success Naomi Mc Laughlan

Goal setting is the true secret to success in any area of life. But although setting a goal may seem simple, achieving it is usually another question altogether.

Why is that?

Because you will never achieve your goals unless you: (1) know exactly what you want, (2) are passionate about your goal, and (3) have a solid, realistic plan of action. This is what marks the difference between nebulous dreams and wishes – and truly achievable goals!

Many obstacles and challenges will fly right in your face when you’re going after a goal.

Here are 5 Time-tested Methods that will Help get the Success You Deserve;

1. Know exactly what your goal is

Your first job is to discover exactly what your goal is. What will achieving that goal really look like? Be as specific as possible about exactly what your desired end result is. Your success will be a measure of your clarity – since an achievable goal plan cannot be created around a nebulous “dream.”

If your goal is to create a more successful business, what will that look like? Are you thinking in terms of simply hiring someone else to give you more free time? Are you looking for a very specific monthly profit? Or can your goal be best expressed in terms of a certain lifestyle?

Regardless of what you want, the best way to get it is to first clarify exactly what you want in as much detail as possible. This can be hard work. But without a clear mental picture, you’ll never have the focus required to achieve your goal.

2. Be willing to pay the opportunity cost aka “entry fee”


Success takes dedicated planning and effort. In a way it’s like building a house. In the beginning all you have is a rough concept. Then you develop a complete set of plans – and you immediately move closer to success. The same is true of creating a better lifestyle, or a more successful business.

But there’s always an *entry fee* to be paid for success.

The entry fee?

Creating more success in your business may mean less recreational time. Writing your own book may require less TV. Being closer to your children may require adjusting your work or social activities.

It’s the “full glass” deal. If your life (your time) is already full to the top, there’s no room for something new. The entry fee is carving out the time to create that something new.

3. Focus on your goal every day

I’m sure you probably want to achieve your goal as fast as possible. That’s why clear mental focus is so very important.

Consistent daily focus is absolutely necessary to “burn in” the new neural pathways you need to create your new goal. Without daily focus, the old mental habits that have kept you from your goal will continue to take over.

This happens automatically – since these old habits replay 24/7 deep in your subconscious mind. The only way to override subconscious anti-success messages is to consciously focus on what you DO want – and build new neural networks!

That’s why success is an every-day event.

Re-commit to your goal every day. Don’t let your goal take a back seat to the daily tasks and distractions that will try to take over. Life WILL try to get in your way. Just get, and stay, on course every day. Focus on your goal, and on success!

4. Get passionate

One of the most powerful tools in your “success tool box” is having real passion for your goal.

Why passion?

Because intense passionate desire for your goal will help you burn in those new neural pathways even faster. Many, many scientific studies have shown that intense emotion (passion) is a key success tool.

PLUS (and this is really a *big* plus), intense passion will also help you rapidly override any inappropriate old “failure messages” stored in your subconscious mind.

5. Take consistent action

In many ways, actually taking action can be the most difficult step. Successful goal achievement is built by taking one small action after another.

Let me know what you think!

All the Best,

Naomi

P.S.: Book Your 1st Business or Multimedia Marketing Strategy session today!

No Phone & No Refund!!! EBay & PayPal Error – Lesson in BAD CUSTOMER SERVICE

paypal-pending-until-error-no-money-no-phone-no-refund-naomi-mc-laughlan-screenshot

Let me tell you how I have received the MOST Outrages Customer Service EVER (by the way the issue is still not resolved, so I am warning every customer’s in good faith of purchasing something right now over both platforms!

I purchased a phone on the 15th February 2017, a seller refurbished LG G3, for my son for £105,99, via EBay. Although the phone was advertised as “Grade A -‘Great Working Condition’ – 12 Month Warranty – UK seller”, the Wi-Fi would not connect. I contacted the seller, requested a return due to the error, which he accepted and I send the phone back.

The return process seems to work all fine until then…

I waited for the refund…but nothing happened.

I contacted PayPal three times via phone, as well as via email and each time I was told that the refund is in process and I should receive my money back no later than the 1st March.

Today, I contacted PayPal once again, and was seriously asked by the advisor “So you NEED your money back?” Oh so is it wrong to want money back on a rightfully refunded item then???

The lady could give me no date, but shared with me that I am not the only customer waiting on a refund, as ALL refunds around the 15 February 2017 are put on hold or ‘Pending’ due to a technical issue, which may or may not be resolved soon. When I asked her for a specific date, I could expect my funds to be back in my account, she could not state a date, as she said she did not want to disappoint me.

OMG!!! Seriously?!! Customer Service at its finest!

I also contacted the seller today, but no response yet.

Next, I contacted EBay, only to be told by the customer advisor that there is not much they can do, as in their system the case is closed and I have received my refund on the 22nd. NOT!!! He actually gave me a Payment Transaction ID and asked me to contact PayPal again, so that they can help me ‘locate’ the refund in my account summary!!! Really? So all I need is a code and THEN I can SEE the transaction???

Nope, of cause not. Because there has NEVER been a REFUND! —PENDING UNTIL….

paypal-pending-until-error-no-money-no-phone-no-refund-naomi-mc-laughlan-screenshot-2-pending-until

If you run a business with such dreadful customer service, be advised; customers may WARN others about the really, really bad experience and may chose other service providers for their next transactions instead!!

Have you ever experienced any issues with EBay or PayPal, I am happy to hear about it, so leave me your comments below! If we don’t call out bad service, IT WILL NEVER CHANGE!!!

Will keep you updated.

Until then.

All the Best,

Naomi xxx

Unlock Your Natural Creativity

creativity-naomi-mc-laughlan

We all have the power to be creative. It’s part of our natural make-up as human beings. The trouble is that, too often, we sabotage our natural creativity. Lack Creativity? …

Here are 7 Ways to Unlock Your Natural Creativity

1. Don’t Make Assumptions.

Assumptions are examples of lazy thinking. We simply don’t wait to get all the information we need to come to the right conclusions.

Tip: When you feel yourself wanting to draw conclusions, just wait until you have all the information.

2. See Things from Other Points of View.

A truly open mind is willing to accept that, not only do other people have other just as valid points of view from theirs, but that these other points of view may be more valid.

Tip: Don’t have a monopoly on how things are. Things aren’t always what they seem. Be ready to consider other points of view.

3. Avoid Yo-Yo Thinking.

Some people tend to have a tendency to swing from a highly positive mood one minute to a highly negative one the next, all because of what they see in front of them. It’s like a yo-yo: up one minute, down the next. It’s far healthier to stay neutral and not let emotions get the better of you.

Tip: Remember that things are rarely as good – or as bad – as you think they are.

4. Get Rid of Lazy Thinking Habits.

Habit can be a major stumbling block to clear thinking and another example of laziness.

Tip: Don’t think that, just because things happened in a certain way once before, that they will happen like that again.

5. Don’t Think Like an Old Person, Think Like a Child.

Research shows that the number of synapses, or connections, in the brain is greater in a child of two than in an average adult. The reason for this is that, while a child of two has no limiting world view, as adults we do. It’s like a sculptor who starts off with a large block of clay, more than he needs, and then gradually removes the clay as he moulds his sculpture. If we use our brain like a child, accepting everything without judgment, we can actually halt and reverse the brain ageing process.

Tip: Don’t worry about the myth of age. With the right stimulus and a passion for learning, you can actually improve your brain’s powers.

6. See The Detail as well as The Big Picture.

You may know the poem by John Godfrey Saxe called “The Blind Men and the Elephant”. This tells how six blind men of Indostan go to see an elephant and each try to work out what it is from touching it. One blind man touches the tusk, another the trunk, another the tail, and so on. Of course, not being able to see the whole elephant, they come to wildly different conclusions.

Tip: Try to keep the big picture in front of you while looking at details. It will help to put everything in its proper place and context.

7. Think for Yourself.

Taking time out to think is still frowned on in many organizations that prize activity over creativity. People who work in creativity-constrained organizations are likely to think the way they are supposed to think, or as others think, or as has always been the way to think. It’s like the blinkered thinking that Hans Christian Anderson describes in his story of “The Emperor’s New Clothes”. Everyone in the land refuses to see that the emperor is naked and has been duped into believing he is wearing a splendid costume for his coronation. Only a young boy who has been ill and not party to the cultural brainwashing can see the truth and cries out: “Look, everyone, the Emperor is wearing no clothes!”

Tip: Don’t let others tell you how to think. When others ask your opinion, tell it to them straight.

Once you make these 7 techniques part of your habitual thinking patterns, you will amaze yourself with how easy it is to come up with fresh, innovative and creative solutions to all of life’s problems.

Let me know what you think in the comment section below!

Please LIKE > COMMENT > FOLLOW & SHARE

All the Best,

Naomi

 

How to apply Global Goals to your Business 💿⭐Audiobook Release

global-goals-ad-naomi-mc-laughlan

I am super exited!!!

How to apply Global Goals to Your Business is now available exclusively via Amazon, Audible and ITunes!


How to apply Global Goals to your business: The #1 Guide to becoming Greener, Leaner, and more Profitable by applying the 17 Sustainable Development Goals, is the ultimate guide book for any micro-, small and medium sized business, as well as solo entrepreneur, as it highlights:

* What Global Goals are,
* Why business owners need to care, and
* How to apply each individual Goal to your business.

With the help of practical examples, 60 innovative ideas and two well researched case studies Naomi Mc Laughlan has taken great effort to cover this huge field of environmental and society friendly business strategy approach.

Furthermore, you will learn about the Value Chain and your Customer’s Journey, and how you can adapt your business to reduce any form of waste in the Chapter on Lean Management. You may wonder what Green Leadership and Green Marketing can do for you. No need! You will find out when you read through the chapters. You will also discover how you can tie it all together and write your first Corporate Social Responsibility Policy and you own Agenda for Change.


Dear Business Owner & Entrepreneur,

I am highly exited that you are interested to read this book, because I really believe that it can help your business in regards to applying the #GlobalGoals, as well as making your business run smoother to increase your profits and yet reduce your costs.
By doing so, you create a ‘WIN-Win-Win’ scenario.

Imagine your business and you as a leader to become the ‘go-to‘ person in your field, as you are the pioneer in initiating changing behaviours that are wanted and needed by the people you serve with your products and services. I wrote this book with all sectors and industries in mind, because I know that no matter what you do, you will have the ability to create amazing results, even if you just implement a few changes.

The strategies, tips and innovative ideas in this book help you, if you are a business with a ‘brick-and-mortar’ store and sell products, or offer a service, whether you are solely online based and whether you are a micro-, small all medium sized, as well as B2B and B2C sector businesses.

Here is a Chapter Overview, which will aid you to decide if this book is for you:
Note to the Readers
Introduction
Dedication
Chapter 1 What are Global Goals?
Chapter 2 Why should I care about Global Goals?
Chapter 3 How to apply Global Goals to your business
Chapter 4 The Value Chain
Chapter 5 Customer Journey
Chapter 6 Green Communication
Chapter 7 Lean Management
Chapter 8 Green Leadership
Chapter 9 Corporate Social Responsibility
Chapter 10 Apply Global Goal #1 Innovative ideas
Chapter 11 Apply Global Goal #2 Innovative ideas
Chapter 12 Apply Global Goal #3 Innovative ideas
Chapter 13 Apply Global Goal #4 Innovative ideas
Chapter 14 Apply Global Goal #5 Innovative ideas
Chapter 15 Apply Global Goal #6 Innovative ideas
Chapter 16 Apply Global Goal #7 Innovative ideas
Chapter 17 Apply Global Goal #8 Innovative ideas
Chapter 18 Apply Global Goal #9 Innovative ideas
Chapter 19 Apply Global Goal #10 Innovative ideas
Chapter 20 Apply Global Goal #11 Innovative ideas
Chapter 21 Apply Global Goal #12 Innovative ideas
Chapter 22 Apply Global Goal #13 Innovative ideas
Chapter 23 Apply Global Goal #14 Innovative ideas
Chapter 24 Apply Global Goal #15 Innovative ideas
Chapter 25 Apply Global Goal #16 Innovative ideas
Chapter 26 Apply Global Goal #17 Innovative ideas
Chapter 27 Case Study 1
Chapter 28 Case Study 2
Conclusion
References
Further Reading
Your Help Please!
About the Author

After you have read or listen to this book, please leave me your honest review on Amazon, Audible or ITunes. Thank you! 😉

Let me know what you think in the comment section below.

All the Best,

Naomi xxx

P.S.: Please LIKE< COMMENT<FOLLOW & SHARE

Shut all Gremlins Up – To Succeed with your New Year’s Resolution – 31 Day Challenge / Day 31

Gremlins Naomi Mc Laughlan

According to a study conducted by the University of Scranton, Journal of Clinical Psychology (2015), only 8% are successful in achieving their New Year’s Resolution. The study also found that losing weight takes the top priority, followed by getting organized, becoming money savvy and enjoying life.

There may be many reasons why people cannot stick to their New Year’s Resolution, of which I have experiences the so called ‘Gremlins’ play a huge role.

There are inner and outer Gremlins who may sabotage your efforts and willpower to set goals for yourself and actually success in accomplishing those.

Inner Gremlins include:

  • Self-doubt
  • Self-conciseness
  • Negative Self- talk
  • Dwelling on past failures
  • Fear of Failure
  • Self-pity

You may recognise your inner Gremlins leading your  inner conversations like this:

  • I can’t do it
  • I am not worth it
  • I must be perfect
  • I am not good enough
  • Nobody loves
  • Nobody believes in me
  • I must not make a mistake…

Outer Gremlins include:

  • Discouraging words by others
  • Getting reminded of past failures
  • Naysayers
  • Jealous people

You may recognise outer Gremlins who say something like:

  • Are you really sure about it?
  • It didn’t work last time you tried
  • Have you checked and double checked all the facts?
  • I don’t think you are up for this…

Whether inner or outer Gremlins – Shut them up!

They are not helpful or encouraging you to fulfill your dreams.

Raise your inner spirit and chances to succeed, by listing everything that you have accomplished in 2015.

This will allow you to shift your focus from failure to success.

Let me know what you think.

Have a Happy New Year & Speak to you soon Happy New Year NaomiMclaughlan

Naomi xxx

P.S.: I hope you have enjoyed the 31 Day Challenge. I certainly have! I am actually surprised how well it went, as I received appreciative comments, likes and shares from you – THANK YOU! And I have been able to keep up with my daily posts (although, at times there were really late…-Shut up inner Gremlin!).